See also: Newton Superintendent Agrees That Many Parents Are Unhappy

By Susan Greenleaf
November, 2000

What should parents do when family values conflict with those being taught in school?

This was the theme of a meeting held last Thursday by Newton Parents for Moderation at the Newton Public Library, which had an overwhelming turnout of hundreds of people.

An ad in the Newton Tab as well as the distribution of flyers on windshields and bulletin boards invited parents and educators to come and share their thoughts and concerns over the controversial sexual material being presented to children of all ages in Newton schools.

However, the majority of the audience were homosexuals who felt compelled to defend their lifestyles after reading misleading information about the parents' group in the Boston Globe article, "War of Words," by Eileen McNamara printed the day before the meeting.

“The article was a total distortion of what our group is all about,” said Sam Washburn, chairperson and founder of Newton Parents for Moderation. “Ms. McNamara never even spoke to me or anyone else in the group before writing the column. She drew conclusions which are false which we would have clarified if she had bothered to call. It was a very sloppy piece of journalism and I’m very glad you can hear this straight from the horse’s mouth.”

Feeling the tension, Washburn expressed his hope that the meeting would be polite and civil since the topics discussed could bring out a lot of emotions and heated discussions. He broke the ice when he said that anyone that didn’t want to be civil and polite could leave. 

He said, “Today’s schools differ from my school days because there are many more non-academic topics being discussed all the way down to the elementary level, including sexual topics, outside of the Sex Ed class.

“Newton is a very diverse community and because of the diverse religions, ethnic groups and child rearing beliefs, when you mix the diversity of the community with some of these topics being discussed in the schools, you’re going to have friction. Friction’s not a bad thing, but it needs to be dealt with in an appropriate manner.”

He went on to explain that Newton Parents for Moderation was formed to address this friction in a parent-friendly way. It aims for the schools to involve the parents by informing them of sensitive material that might be presented to the children and to give parents the option to opt their children out if material is uncomfortable for a particular family for reasons of religion or culture.

Washburn cited some of the incidents in the city’s schools that have caused the Newton parents to mobilize and form the group, including David Gaita's "coming out" to his class of six-year-olds without consulting parents first and a teacher's assigning a class of fifteen-year-olds to go and buy a condom for homework.

Washburn said, “Parents in our group have valid concerns based on child development strategies, psychosocial development theories, age appropriateness and the beliefs and child rearing traditions of their extended families. What’s wrong with respecting those differences and informing families?” 

The controversial Tufts University “Teachout” conference last March, put on by GLSEN and endorsed by the Department of Education, disturbed the parents as well when they discovered that the graphic homosexual content of the seminars had nothing to do with the description given in a Newton school publication advertising the conference. “Parents would never want their children exposed to some of these workshops and seminars, but we weren’t told what was really going on,” said Washburn.

He said that after many parents found out about the sexual content of the workshops, it made them feel very uncomfortable to see a group that uses crude sexual slurs in their seminars and inflammatory language in the titles of those seminars being endorsed by the school department. “So the question comes up, is this going to come full bore into our classrooms?” he explained.

Washburn listed other reasons for starting the group: his group's research indicated that people in Newton are paid by GLSEN to do GLSEN's work in the schools. GLSEN promotes tolerance and safety in our schools, but also the introduction of sexual issues into all grades, and elementry schools lesson plans include defing homosexuality and laying out the details of same sex couples.  He said, "Lesson plans seem to be reflecting the philosophy of the GLSEN group. For some people that is a concern."

During a heated discussion about the David Gaita situation, when some insisted that it was a spontaneous event and parents can not always be informed in these situations, Washburn responded: “The coming out of Gaita was not spontaneous. The principal said a child asked a question and he answered it.  But subsequently in an interview with Bay Windows, Gaita revealed that he had decided in advance that he would do it and would wait for the opportunity to present himself. He talked to the principal about it and she supported him. That statement said that he knew and the principal knew, so why couldn’t the parents know too and be informed in advance this was going to happen? This is just one more reason why we said: ‘We need to form this group.'"

The Newton group was pleased to hear that their Mission Statement had been passed out by the superintendent of the schools, Jeffrey Young at a principals’ meeting, although they were not pleased when he spoke at teachers’ meeting a week later and stated that the teachers’ right to express their personality and who they were trumped the rights of parents to be informed.

As Washburn fielded questions, the feeling in the room eventually changed from challenging Washburn to a mutual effort on everyone’s part to really hear one another out. Individuals shed tears as they recounted stories of trying to deal with the pain of discrimination because of race or sexual gender, and that people tryied to understand each other’s issues. After the meeting, groups came together to talk more and it seemed that maybe, just maybe, Eileen McNamara had inadvertently done everyone a favor.

For a copy of the Mission Statement of Newton Parents for Moderation contact, Sam Washburn at 617-332-9445, NPM@pobox.com
 

Newton Superintendent Agrees That Many Parents Are Unhappy

Many Newton parents are unhappy with the teaching of homosexual values in the schools, revealed Superintendent of Newton schools, Jeffrey Young, in a recent teacher's meeting.

He said, “A gay teacher’s decision to come out to his class produced reactions of near seismic proportions.” 

Young also stated that if there is a conflict between the values of parents and those of the school, it is the school which predominates over the parents.

“[W]e have some citizens who believe parents should have the right to exercise more control over the experiences their children encounter in school….Parents are understandably concerned about what happens in the classrooms of the schools their children attend. But as I weigh these two competing claims to rights, I conclude that fundamental human rights, the right to be who we are without shame or fear, supercedes others’ rights to control the school environment,” he said.