A Massachusetts Miracle 649 Teens Commit To Abstinence until Marriage By Ed Oliver October 8, 2002

Left to Right: Jordan Payne, Callie Ernst and Ian Shepard show off rings.

Over 850 young people packed the gym at a school in North Easton last Saturday to hear a faith-based message about abstinence at a dynamic presentation called "The Silver Ring Thing." At the end of the three-hour event, 649 teens put on silver rings to symbolize their commitment to stay sexually pure until marriage.

"We didn't have any idea how many kids would show up. It's a miracle," said Lynn Payne, a parent who was instrumental in bringing the event to Massachusetts."

Kids get their rings after the show.

Wall-to-wall teens, some with their younger siblings in tow, soaked up a positive message about abstinence in a fun way through skits, music videos, mock commercials, comedy, heart-to-heart talks and even some medical information from a physician. The kids learned about the advantages of waiting until they are married, and how they rob themselves and their future spouse of a once-in-a-lifetime gift of their virginity. They heard about the emotional and physical damage that often results from early sex. They heard about the lies of "safe sex." They learned to look at relationships in a different way than has been portrayed in the media.

Even those who have already "gone too far" learned that it is never too late to start over and do the right thing.

God was not left out of the lesson. Along with a hand-fashioned Sterling Silver ring, the kids received an abstinence study Bible geared toward youth. They learned about accountability to God and that they will most likely fail without asking for His help. The teens were not turned off by the underlying Christian message. In fact, after it was over, 89 teens chose to make Christ the center of their lives.

There is a follow-up program to help the kids stay committed, including choosing a same-sex partner for reinforcement.

Came to Massachusetts After Family Saw It in Pitttsburg

"The Silver Ring Thing" came to Massachusetts after Lynne Payne and her daughter Jordan flew to Pittsburg with another mother and daughter to attend the program last year. Jordan and her friend Callie Ernst put on the ring and made the commitment at that time. Jordan told her mother that this program had to be brought back home for their friends. After other parents jumped on board, the word was spread through contacts in private schools, churches and the YMCA. It costs $10,000 to put on the event. Not all the money was raised in time, but the show went on anyway. The parents didn't try to bring the program in through the public schools, but organized it privately and only approached the town for permission to use the facility, Richardson/Olmstead School.

Wall-to-wall teens, some with their younger siblings in tow, soaked up a positive message about abstinence in a fun way through skits, music videos, mock commercials, comedy, heart-to-heart talks and even some medical information from a physician.

Admission was free. The ring and the Bible were sold at cost for a refundable twelve dollars.

Lynne Payne told MassNews, "We're finding that our kids are listening to all kinds of stuff in the media and music, and what they see on TV is just a bunch of lies. It doesn't show the consequences of sex and oral sex and all the stuff that these kids are exposed to. So we just decided that we'd bring something in that talks about the truth in a really cutting-edge, fun way, just to get the message out."

A Big Production

The Silver Ring Thing's founder, Denny Pattyn, told MassNews, "When I was in Arizona in 1995, I began to realize that this nation's kids were really under attack and there was no help for them to get to their marriage bed with any kind of decency, so we just thought we needed a first class, 21st century model to get a vision to kids so they can do that. I don't care what the culture says; they can discipline their lives to wait for marriage to have sex."

Pattyn traveled to North Easton from Pennsylvania with a crew of 25 young people and a hundred thousand dollars worth of sound and stage equipment. In addition, twenty young volunteer crew members from Massachusetts were prepared ahead of time for additional duties.

"We have a lot of students involved in the program," said Pattyn. "We don't want a bunch of adults telling a bunch of kids not to have sex. We want a bunch of kids saying, 'I'm not having sex. I'm proud to say that and I'm going to stand up for it in my school and let people know me for that.'"

Pattyn and his crew are sincere about what they are doing. As hundreds of teens noisily waited outside the doors just before show time, MassNews entered the darkened gym to find the crew standing in a circle with heads bowed and holding hands, taking turns praying aloud for the teen's lives to be changed by the message.

The show's director, Deb Ott, told MassNews, "The Silver Ring Thing in a nutshell is about guys, girls, dating, love, second chances and the best choices. It is really a positive alternative to all the other dating advice out there."

Asked how they get such enthusiasm from the kids, Ott said, "I think because it is really peer-driven. It is not a bunch of adults standing up here lecturing them like its health class. It's their peers who are just being real and honest about what's going on in their lives and the best thing that they have found."

MassNews asked Ott how schools react to the program. She said schools wish they could have it, but the Christian message poses a problem. "I've had a lot of schools say, "We want you here, but there is just so much red tape we have to go through to make it all kosher and legit.'" Ott said a lot of middle schools tell them they are having problems with kids having oral sex in bathrooms or in class. She said one way it can work is to have an assembly during school that is non-religious in nature, and invite the kids to come back in the evening or on a weekend for the full show with a spiritual kick to it. She could not remember ever having any interest from Massachusetts schools. Ott said they put on shows 3 or 4 weekends a month and some speaking engagements in between.

Ott took part in the show herself. She gave a heart-to-heart talk about how she was pressured into sex by an older college boy when she was sixteen and how she felt afterward. She compared herself to the woman caught in adultery in the Bible and how Jesus told her he didn't condemn her, but to go and sin no more.

Teens Challenged to Fix It

One adult who did briefly lecture the kids was Dr. Jimmy Stands, an obstetrics/ gynecologist from New York with 23 years experience treating women. Stands told the kids his message is very simple: "There is no such thing as safe sex outside of marriage."

Stands told the kids he has given out birth control pills, preached condoms, preached safe sex, and then had to treat the tearful follow-ups that came into his office. "It hurts me to see all these girls come in with STD's and I have to tell them there is no cure for them."

Near the end of the show, Denny Pattyn told the audience, "I personally want to apologize to every one of you for what we as adults have done to the youth culture you have to live in. I want to apologize to you for the mess we've made of it. For the mess we've made of marriages, for the stuff you have to watch on TV, which literally lies to you on a daily basis, and the fact we didn't stop it in our generation. I deeply mean this, I am sorry that you have to live in that garbage every day, it's not your fault for the temptations you have to deal with."

Then Pattyn challenged the kids, "Will you be the generation that fixes it?"

Proud to Endure Teasing

Jordan Payne, 15, spoke at the end of the show. She told how she endured teasing and ridicule from her peers for wearing the ring. She said she tearfully threw it away in the woods, but her mother found it for her and Jordan hasn't taken it off since.

"I'm proud to stand up in front of 800 teens, my friends and peers, and say I'm waiting until I'm married. Abstinence is cool," Payne said. "And for all you guys out there, I hope you put on rings. Give us girls hope that there are guys out there waiting for us."

Analysis: Parents Provide Antidote To Negative Influence of Media And Schools By Ed Oliver October 8, 2002 One has to wonder, with all the money that is poured into education in Massachusetts and with no shortage of sex education in the schools, why did parents in Easton feel it was necessary to sponsor an abstinence event to counteract the dangerous messages their kids are getting from the media?

At the end of the three-hour event, 649 teens put on silver rings to symbolize their commitment to stay sexually pure until marriage.

Aren't the schools doing that job already? What are we paying them for?

By their actions the parents condemned the miserable job the schools are doing. It is a travesty that at a time of life when kids are most vulnerable, authority figures in public school feed them the absolute wrong message about sex. As amply documented in the pages of MassNews, the schools teach the lie of "safe sex," hand out condoms, encourage their participation in gay/straight alliance clubs, and place them under the influence of homosexual activists at assemblies, health classes, rallies, parades, and annual conferences like Fistgate. Abstinence is often treated as nice, but not realistic.

The "Silver Ring Thing" event in North Easton was a perfect example of why sex education is better left to the parents, who in this case upstaged the school system in an imaginative and effective way, making it easier for kids to say "no."

Take these kids away from the professional educators for just three hours, expose them to some true facts and common sense, and look at the positive results: 649 kids made a public commitment to stay sexually pure until they are married. Imagine if they had this positive reinforcement on a daily basis in the schools. The kids enthusiastically responded to the message. It was a joy to see. These kids are bravely resisting pressure to have sex before they are married.

Contrast that positive, parent sponsored event to the GLSEN conference at Tufts University, where the Massachusetts Public Schools send about 700 kids every year. There, if nobody catches them, gay activists instruct the kids in the how-to of dangerous practices like "fisting" and oral sex. Kids can pick up fisting/oral sex kits donated by Planned Parenthood complete with dental dams, latex gloves, K-Y Jelly and instructions. The message is pounded into the kids that they may be homosexual, which they are told is "normal, natural and healthy." Homosexual Hollywood stars are brought in to speak to the kids as role models. The teachers who go to the conference for credit are taught how to carry the gay message back to the schools and to incorporate it into the curriculum, even in pre-school.

In truth, it shouldn't be the job of the public schools to teach kids about sex. God charged parents with the sacred trust of teaching their children in the way they should go. The atheistic, state-run education system where we've dumped our kids represents the abandonment of that trust. It is encouraging to see parents begin to take matters into their own hands again.

Tuesday January 13, 2004 News Links World Net Daily **Agape Press * TownHall.com * FreeCongress.org FoxNews.com *Media Research * CNSnews.com * Human Events **